The Art of Self Perception

She held up the drawing to me- a self-portrait. I asked her what she thought of it and she said liked it, yet admitted she could have demonstrated a wider range of value. I agreed.

I didn’t want to say too much. I didn’t want to criticize. That certainly that wasn’t the point. The drawing was merely a mark in time; the beginning of her process. Who was I to judge her perceived self? I explained to her the first time I showed my mug to the public. Mind you, this was not the first self-portrait I ever did, merely the first one I was actually comfortable enough to show.

“Your nose isn’t that big,” someone assured me.

“Your nose should be bigger,” someone else declared.

“Your face is fatter,” I was told.

And so it went. I received an equal amount of praise and criticism from friends and family alike... whether I wanted to or not.

A portrait is challenging enough, but a self-portrait even more so. We know ourselves better than anyone else but can easily get caught up in preconceived ideas about who we are. Consequently, we tend to view ourselves in a subjective light revealing our own biases and criticisms of ourselves through the rendering of facial features in terms of exaggeration, distortion, addition or omission. In some instances, these embellishments are deliberate, but often this is not the case. Not to mention the complexity of technical skills it requires to draw a face in the first place.

This exercise in self-perception is designed for the artist to learn to view the world more objectively and thus, yield a work that rings true with its audience because it comes from a place of honesty. Finding this honesty in a self-portrait takes practice.

It has been over a year since the last self-portrait I painted. After my student presented her work, I felt it was time to do another. So yesterday I drew one (pictured to the right). I think it's good, but there's always room for improvement. We are all just works in progress. Please feel free to comment on any of this.

Artist Update (11/09)

I just picked up my work from this year’s Lone Tree Art Exhibition where I had one piece that was accepted into the juried competition. Last week was the kick off for Denver Arts Week. I hosted an open studio for First Friday. It was nice to see some new faces.

This week, I return a clean studio for art lessons and painting- I currently have three students and am working on several new paintings. Five of them are for several commissioned projects, including a jazz painting for the soon-to-be Rocky Mountain Hospital For Children which will open in 2010. I am very excited about this project.

I will post more blogs with images soon along with updates to my website. Until then…

Creators (or “My Name Is Earl For Pictures”)

Last week, I attended a reception for “Creators”, a collection of new black and white portraits by Denver Artist, Sharon Brown. Sharon is an oil painter and her studio is just down the street from mine. Over the course of the last year, we have had several opportunities to collaborate, the last of which was for an exhibition/presentation with a group called Welcome Colorado.

Before the group arrived for that particular event, I was helping to get things in order at The Pattern Shop Studio. We had just finished setting up when she disappeared and quickly returned with a camera in hand. I’m not big on photos, but was flattered, assuming she was capturing the moment on film.

“Why don’t you stand up against that wall,” she directed, moving me near a self-portrait of mine. I straightened my posture and beamed right into the camera. Usually, I detest getting my picture taken, but I was rather excited for the upcoming event and couldn't conceal my ear to ear grin.

“Don’t smile,” she said.

“Excuse me?” I thought I misunderstood what she said.

“Don’t smile. I want a serious shot of you. It’s for a project of mine.”

I was confused. I thought about all the times I didn’t want to smile for a picture and now I was being asked not to and I couldn’t help myself. For the first time, maybe ever, I actually had to suppress happiness for a photograph. Oh, the irony. It took a few takes to get a decent shot with my eyes open (I seem to have the same problem as Earl in My Name Is Earl when it comes to keeping my eyes open for pictures). Thank goodness for digital cameras.

After she took the picture, she explained to me that she had taken my photograph along with a number of other artists in the RiNo area and was working to put together a show of black and white, monochromatic oil paintings of all the creative people she knew. Last Friday was the opening for that show, which, by the way, if you’re in the Denver area for this First Friday (November 6th), will be open for your viewing pleasure; just down the street, in fact, from my studio which will also be open.

The reception for Creators was wonderful- Sharon and her husband are such gracious hosts. There were quite a few people and the paintings were very well done. She thoughtfully arranged each painting to make sure it was paired with another for one reason or another. Together, the body of work made for a warm, intriguing, ethereal atmosphere that really captured a nice depth in the facial features. I would certainly recommend seeing the show. Maybe after that, come down to my studio... just down the block- I’ve got new paintings to show you too.

For more information, please visit:
www.jaredsteinberg.com
www.patternshopstudio.com
www.rivernorthart.com
and http://www.denver.org/DenverArtsWeek/

On The Surface, Part III

Tony and I returned to his woodshop from the storage unit. During the trip he talked about his early experiences with the professional art world. The topic seemed to stir something up in him as he couldn’t understand why gallery owners and dealers typically pigeon-hole artists into a single type of work- a topic for debate with many artists.

On one hand, you have dealers and brokers who are attempting to sell something based off a certain level of consistency and thus quality. Without being able to depend on that, it would be a challenge to sell artwork. On the other hand, artists tend to explore options and variety through composition, at times varying the style or approach of the subject matter based on what they are feeling at any given time. For some, repeating the successes of past works to create consistent, predictable work can take the joy out of the creative process. Tony sided with the latter argument, citing the negative impact it had on his father and his father’s artist friends. I have my own thoughts on the matter, but will discuss that in another entry.

In any case, we began cutting down strips of maple to secure to the backside of the hardboard surfaces. During the process, Tony handed me a brochure for The Santa Fe Trail. I remember he had mentioned it earlier, but now that it was before me, he beamed as he told me the whole story. Essentially, he created the entire brochure- a commissioned project by the state of New Mexico where he spent a year, on location, creating a map of the trail, the corresponding text and some of the most sophisticated black and white drawings I have ever seen. I was amazed by the variety of creativity within the brochure itself and understood more than ever his frustration with the gallery system.

Here was a man who possessed talents to do life-like portraits, design a brochure, create a map, build furniture and was learning chemistry in his spare time, in addition to a list of many other creative endeavors. With all of these skills, it was easy for me to understand his concern as it related to pursuing art as a full-time career. Tony was simply beyond category. “I don’t want to paint just trees,” he told me.

By the end of the night, we had cut materials for four boards, glued them on to the back of the hardboard surface and sanded down the edges so the backing was completely flush with the facade. They looked just as I pictured and I was thrilled with my new painting surfaces.

Tony let me keep a copy of the brochure which I took home and promptly shared with JQ. As Tony and I work to refine process and product with the painting boards, he continues to challenge me to improve as both an artist and a free thinker. I look forward not only to working with him on more projects, but returning his generosity and helping him in any way I can. Surely, there will be more stories to come.

On The Surface, Part II

David and I walked up the driveway toward an open garage on a warm, late summer night. An older gentleman stood on the left side of the entry, lingering from his exchange with Tony who turned around to see us approaching. We shook hands as David introduced me, providing a little background for us being there. I needed help putting together a wooden surface for my paintings and was hoping Tony would be willing to advise me on the best way to do that. It didn’t take much convincing for him to agree to the endeavor. After the introductions, Tony handed a painted canvas over to the other gentleman who thanked him and left soon thereafter. The painting was a portrait- very well done and realistically rendered.

Tony invited us into his house where he showed some samples of his own paintings. A few of them were painted on wooden boards, giving us a point of reference for the project. I had no idea he was an artist and was very impressed with the photo-realistic quality of his paintings. I asked him if he had ever shown his work in a more formal setting such as a gallery. He just smiled back and told me he only painted for himself. Seeing I was genuinely interested in his work, Tony took us back to a cramped room in the far corner of the house that served as his artist studio. There, he had rigged an easel up to a wall with a makeshift lighting arrangement hanging from the ceiling. On the easel was a painting in progress with a reference photograph tacked above it and to the right; there was little difference between the two. I realized then the painting Tony handed over earlier in the garage must have been a commissioned work.

We soon returned to the wood shop and got down to business. David excused himself to return home as Tony and I began to discuss technical matters. I had brought over two boards that were cut in half from one giant 8’ x 8’ sheet of hardboard. With the help of his giant table saw, it didn’t take long for us to cut six new rectangular surfaces down to size for our first attempt at these painting boards. Tony advised me on options for preparing the surface and we agreed to meet in the next week or so to apply a cradle/frame backing to the eighth-inch thick boards, providing both support and a nice finish to the wood.

I left Tony’s wood shop that night charged. His knowledge, selflessness and background in art were refreshing and inspirational. I returned to my studio that week and experimented with several different methods for priming the wooden surfaces, keeping in mind the scientific properties I had learned from Tony and the other woodworkers I had consulted with. Two weeks later, I returned to Tony’s garage.

The evening began with a trip out to his storage unit where he had some scraps of maple he thought would suffice as the backing to the boards. During our conversation on the way, he told me a little bit more about himself and I was happy to find some common ground in the way we view the world. Like me, he had worked in corporate america at one time and through his own circumstances, eventually realized that way of earning a living was not for him, so he pursued a career as a self-employed woodworker. Though he was extremely gifted in his craft, he actually was trained at an early age to be a painter. Something about the experience, however, ultimately soured him to the world of professional art as he saw his father who was also an aspiring artist and his father’s artist-friends deal with the strange world of those who earn a living selling other people’s art.

To Be Continued...

On The Surface, Part I

The ring of the saw blade glided to a stop after the last board was cut. Fluorescent lights from the woodshop fell dimly on the driveway as the sun settled behind a gentle pink summer sky blanketing the Denver suburb. We rounded up a group of four one-inch maple strips to apply to the backside of newly trimmed rectangular hardboard. This was all part of a specific painting surface I had been trying to figure out how to make since June. I was fortunate enough to find the assistance of a professional woodworker and delighted in how perfectly this dream seemed to be coming together.

Earlier in the spring, I was short on cash and couldn’t afford to buy canvas material to paint on. I had some old scraps of hardboard stored in the studio, so I took them out, cleaned them up and primed them with gesso to begin new work. I loved the way the paint responded to the hard surface. Not since college had I worked on boards, and even though this re-acquaintance was circumstantial, I couldn’t have been more pleased with the results.

I did notice after I applied the gesso primer and began the actual painting, the long boards bowed ever so slightly. I wondered if it was possible to straighten the wood in order to make them more presentable. I knew other manufacturers were already making similar products, but after I contacted a few, it became obvious that commissioning them to produce custom sized work was not the most cost-effective strategy. Besides, I wanted something that was unique to me- something I had a hand in putting together, without relying entirely on somebody else to produce it for me.

After spending some time at the hardware store and consulting with several friends who were at least a little familiar with woodworking, I wasn’t getting any further along in the process. I made several calls to various wood suppliers in the Denver area, but didn’t find them to be much help either aside from providing me with suggestions for the right materials and some basic knowledge of the properties of wood. Though I was very impressed by their overall attention to detail, I was no closer to finding what I was looking for. I decided I needed to find a subject matter expert who was willing to consult and assist me in the process.

I made one call to my friend David, who seems to know just about everyone who ever did anything under the sun. Sure enough, it didn’t take but a second for him to think of a neighbor who happened to be a professional woodworker, making cabinets and furniture for a living. One week later, I found myself alongside David, walking up the driveway to meet Tony.

To be continued…

Artist Update

In the midst of a busy week, so I don’t have much time to write, but here’s the lowdown in my art world. I learned I was accepted into a juried show for the 2009 Lone Tree Arts Exhibition which runs from October 17th through the 31st here in Lone Tree, Colorado. I’ve been making good progress on the new hardboard painting surfaces and have put together eight of them at this point. I hope to have most, if not all of them ready for my open studio event on November 6th in conjunction with Denver Arts Week. I’ve also been enjoying teaching private art lessons to several students. It’s good to revisit the fundamentals of art while passing them along to other artists. Well, that’s all for now. Next week’s blog will delve deeper into the story behind my new painting boards. Stay tuned…